Build the fire

Injuries. I guess they happen to everyone right? Overuse, improper form, doing too much too soon, not enough sleep, poor nutrition. The list could really keep going. You've heard the schpeel.

Well that's where I am right now. However, my orthopedist isn't yet sure what the problem is. We need an MRI, so were waiting on insurance approval. My left leg is the issue, more specifically my tibia. Its possible I have a stress fracture or I have tendinitis. I'm hoping for the lesser of two evils and its tendinitis.

It all started about a week before my half marathon on October 12th. My leg just felt weird, "not right" but I didn't think too much about it. Two days before the race I was supposed to do a 4 mile easy run but I didn't go. My leg was bothering me so I just decided to skip it. I mean I didn't want to hurt myself two days before my race, and "easy" is relative. To me there is nothing "easy" about running.

You know how some people go for a run to "loosen up"? Yeah. That's not me. Nothing "loosens up" when I run. Sure I might feel better after a hard run but that's because I did something that is hard. I tackled it. I did it when I didn't really want to. Sometimes though, when I run, for a few moments I get a feeling like I'm barely touching the ground with my feet. Everything gets quiet and I'm "in the zone", it lasts for such a short time though (lucky if its 5min) maybe that's the runners high I've heard about. In either case, in the year and a half since I've started running I've experienced it a handful of times.

I digress.

Back to the weekend of my half marathon. So I didn't run that Friday, Saturday I got a sports massage to loosen my legs up, Sunday race day. As soon as I started the race I had sharp shooting pains (same pains from earlier in the week when I wasn't running), it lasted about 3-4 miles then went away. Either it really did go away or I somehow compartmentalized it away. It was a really great race for me. I PR'd (personal record) and aside from walking the aid stations I ran the entire thing. That was a big deal for me. I was very happy with my time and my performance. However, that half marathon seemed so much harder than my half ironman a month earlier. To top it off I was much more sore (3-4 days) after the half marathon than the half ironman. I've been told by several experienced triathletes including my coach that you will almost always feel worse after a half marathon or marathon race than from a half ironman or ironman. Running is harder on your body plus your racing faster and harder. And ya know what? They were right!

So because I was so sore I didn't run, and I hadn't been cycling that much because there just aren't enough daylight hours unless its the weekend. However, running for the bus sure brought that sharp shooting pain right into focus again. It hadn't gone away and it hurt just to walk or stand still. So I iced, stretched and took ibuprofen for a week. Felt like the leg was getting a little better. I had continued to swim since I had no pain in the water. I tested the leg out on a track. As soon as I started to run I had pain. So I laid off it for another week. It even started to hurt when I would climb hills on my bike. Not a good thing. I'm not sure why I didn't go see a doc sooner. I thought it was getting better. But all I had really done was stop doing the things that hurt. So now almost 4 weeks later I went to my PT and she sent me to the doc. She thought it was a fracture. So now I wait for the MRI and the results.

Not sure what's been going on with me lately but I've been eating like crap, not sleeping well, and having bursts of claustrophobia. Maybe I'm not using the right word when I say claustrophobia but its kinda how I feel. A feeling of being trapped. That feeling has been around for a few months. Plus it doesn't help at all that there is not much daylight. I feel starved for it.  The poor sleeping and eating like crap has been going on for about 1-2months. I feel like I'm in a bit of a vicious cycle. Maybe that's why this happened with my leg. Is it burnout? I definitely know I need a vacation. Everyone says I need to make sure I take a break from training but the thing is I haven't felt like I've been doing that much. I need to get back to being consistent. I was doing so well when I was being structured and consistent.

I'm anxious to get the results of the MRI back because then I will know and I can treat my leg properly so I have full recovery. Not being able to have full mobility takes a toll, especially when I wanted to really improve my running this winter. My coach told me to take this time to "build the fire deep, deep, deep in my belly for all the things I want to accomplish in life". Very good words, so I am taking the time to reflect, and build my fire one log at a time. I recently switched to part time status at work; I'm hoping that in making that change I am able to organize myself a little better and create a more efficient way of spending my days and continue pursuing the things that are important to me. Plus I'll get to be out in the daylight more rather than being stuck in a building.

My kindergarten drawing: visual reminder to build the fire

Next week I'm flying out to Tucson AZ to take part in JDRF's Ride to Cure, it could not come at a more perfect time.

Signing off to go build my fire.

Ride to Cure

When I was a child during the summer months you could find me either swimming in the pool until I turned all wrinkly and the sun had gone down or riding my bike all over the neighborhood until I found my way back home hours later. Life was easy then and I had such fun! That was years before being diagnosed as a type 1 diabetic. Over time I had forgotten how much I loved swimming and riding my bike, "why did I ever stop”? Now, after living 15 years with diabetes I have gone back to those fun times thanks to JDRF. I am swimming again and have a new found love for triathlon and on my weekends you’ll find me riding my bike for hours on end. Just like when I was a child. JDRF helped me remember and ultimately has helped me take control of a disease that is with me 24hrs a day, 7 days a week and 365 days a year. There is no break. Ever. It’s not fun especially in the beginning when first diagnosed. Even after 15years it’s still hard. Stressful. Fear of the unknown future and possible diabetic complications. Always questioning myself if I'm doing the right thing with managing this disease. When I think I AM doing the right thing and the numbers don't come out right and everything is crazy…pure frustration, anger and sometimes depression are what ensue. Judgment from strangers, friends and family (whether they realize it or not) with their "helpful comments and suggestions". Judging what I eat, how I take my medicine, how many times I have to go see my doctors. The stress of making sure I have health insurance to cover the insulin my pancreas won't produce so I can LIVE. I need my blood sugar meter. I need my insulin. Without it there is no me.

The JDRF Ride to Cure program brought me back to my childhood fun by getting me to want to be active. By getting me to swim again. By getting me back on my bike. They are also researching ways to make my life along with millions of other diabetic lives easier through new technology and one day a cure. This will be my 5th year riding for them and raising funds. I'm asking for a donation that will help me in achieving my goal of $4,000.00 for this year’s 109 mile ride which will be taking place in Tucson, AZ on November 20, 2010. All donations are tax deductible! I have attached the link for you to make donations by credit card. https://ride.jdrf.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=rideCentral.personalpage&riderID=10144

I didn't choose to have this disease. However I AM choosing how the "betes" and I spend our 24hrs, 7 days a week and 365 days a year together. Follow me through my blog www.trainingdiabeteslife.blogspot.com. Remember YOUR childhood fun. Go back to it. Ride with me. Help me help JDRF. Your continued support of donations in any amount, your words of encouragement...they are invaluable. My thanks to you always.

Jen

Toughman: Morning of Race Day

Race Day - Sunday 9/12:
Morning and Transition set up:
We wake up at 4am, I slept about 5 hours but I felt good (I did get good sleep days leading up to race); I check my blood sugar and I'm 72 suuweeeet! Get ready quickly and eat my 2 hard boiled eggs and PBJ on whole wheat bread (brought it all from home). I bolused (gave myself insulin via pump) for the full amount of carbs I was eating since it would be more than 2 hours until I raced. Let's not forget I also brought my iced coffee from home too. I love my coffee. Love. It. We drive to Croton Point Park where the race is taking place and all is good, getting a little anxious but its ok. It's dark outside. Check the blood sugar and I'm 112. Good number. Soon as we get there I have to go to the bathroom, I was very happy about that. Then I'm off to set up my transition area. I still haven't figured out a way to set up where I'm a 100% comfortable so I look at everyone else's set up to see if I'm missing anything. I then proceed to switch everything around and then switch it around again to its original setting. What can I say we got there early! :) Check the blood sugar again at 5:30 and I'm 157, not concerned cuz I'm thinking the food is hitting its peak and all that jazz. I was starting to get antsy (despite having my ipod on calming music). Its now 5:55am BS (blood sugar) is 180, check again at 6:07am BS 208, I know I seem a little neurotic at this point checking so much but I wanted to see how I was gonna trend because the next time I'd be able to check would be at T1 after the swim. They were closing transition at 6:30 and I wouldn't be swimming until 7:15 and I wouldn't have my CGM (continuous glucose monitor) on me either since it's not waterproof. I WOULD have my insulin pump though because that baby IS waterproof! THANK YOU Animas for peace of mind.

Transition is closing and I get one more test in at 6:30am and my BS is 243, if you've noticed I've been steadily going up. I haven't eaten anything since 4:30am so I know its nerves and adrenaline spiking the blood sugar. It's decision time I wasn't sure if I should keep a temp basal on since I was so high or take some of the recommended 3 units of insulin to hopefully bring my BS down and hopefully avoid a low. I also wasn't sure if I should have a GU before the swim, again I thought it would raise my BS I wasn't even looking at it as "I'm an athlete and I need this fuel." I was thinking of it as "that GU is gonna raise my already high BS even more". I was with my friend Denise (also type 1) and I asked her what she would do; she reminded me to stick to the plan. Let me tell you, it is without a doubt THE BEST thing to have other diabetics racing with you, I had three :).

BS plan for race:
With Denise's advice I stuck to the plan and I only gave myself 1.00 unit of insulin, if I was high after so be it I could correct but I knew I wouldn't go low.

Plan for race was to have a temp basal (amount of base insulin throughout day) of 50% entire time. I calculated the night before how many carbs I would be eating during the bike only and divided that in half, I would then give myself a 20/80% combo bolus over 3 hours. A bolus is delivery of insulin for food or blood sugar correction and making it combo means its over an extended amount of time. I chose 3 hours because I needed the delivery to finish 30min before my run. Running drops your BS very rapidly for most diabetics and any active insulin on board becomes super strength, your body is 10x more responsive to it. So it's VERY important to stick to the plan and eat everything I counted for. Not just because I'm diabetic but also because I've been taught this season as an athlete fueling properly on the bike helps you on the run. So that was my plan and I promised myself, my RD, my coach and my friends who advised me that no matter what my CGM or meter said I'd stick to the plan and not panic.

I wanted a good race and to me that meant trying to stay on schedule with pacing and most importantly not seeing my BS go all crazy like a yo-yo.

Read the next entry to see how the swim goes...

Toughman: Pre-Race

I decided to write each leg this way by reading one of my Brooklyn Tri teammates blogs...so thanks for the idea Shaun!

Pre Race - Saturday:
I woke up early and went with a friend for a 45min ride just to make sure Violet (my bike) was feeling ok, then I ran for 15 minutes to see how the legs felt - all was good :). I drove up with two of my Brooklyn tri teammates later that morning to Croton Point Park where the race was being held so we could check in. I was feeling good, plus I was able to get some A.R.T. (Active release therapy) work done on my foot and shoulder to make sure I was loose. Oh how I LOVE that stuff felt a TON better. Leaving the parking lot I saw a dog that looked just like my Val I almost didn't stop to pet it but I'm glad I did. Reminded me of her and made me feel good.

Later that night as Denise, Mark and I were packing our bags for race day I jumped up and said "oh my god I don't remember packing my helmet!" I knew I didn't leave it with my bike earlier that day but I couldn't remember the action of putting it in or seeing it in the car! I started to hyperventilate therefore making myself light headed. I was FREAKING out! All I was thinking (in my head) was "oh my god, great, after all this training, after the countless tweets and facebook statuses and well wishes from everyone I'm gonna come back and say "yeah I forgot my helmet", oh lord. You can't race without a helmet! Denise, thank god for her (she's been my saving grace this season) she told me to calm down, we could go get one at walmart. I tried calling my friends who I drove up with but I couldn't reach them.

I was trying to calm down so I said "at least I remembered my meter", then Denise says "well that's great but you can race without your meter, you can't race without a helmet!" Gee thanks Denise, I feel much more calm now less than 10hours before the race and no sign of my helmet. So off we go 9:00pm at night day before the race to the shopping center and there are both a Kmart AND a Modell's.  We decided in the car that I would have to get the funniest helmet possible. Mind you I'm still freaking out (in my head), I just want get there! As soon as we get into Modell's my friends called to tell me that...I DID have my helmet I just forgot it in the car :). I asked them 3 times "you're SURE you saw it in there? Because we're here now and I can get a helmet"; mind you I had a lavender colored, child size helmet in my hand with smiley faces and pink flowers. No need to buy it! Ten pounds off the shoulders and about 3oz on my head (I think), I'll take it!

We were in bed by 11pm (late...yes I know), I was dead to the world before my head hit the pillow.

Toughman - Short Version

I haven't written much about my training for the biggest race of my life thus far, but on September 12th I completed my first half Ironman!!! A half Ironman consists of a 1.2 mile swim, 56 mile bike, and a 13.1 mile run all within cut off times for each leg and within a total of 8 hours.

Here's the short of it:
Total time: 7:37:45
Swim: 41:59
T1: 5:58
Bike: 3:44:06
T2: 3:04
Run: 3:02:41
Good blood sugars throughout, I finished strong and with a smile :).

I could have probably saved 1-2min from my swim time by sighting correctly. I couldn't see the finish and the buoys looked like they were on the wrong side; apparently everyone else had the same problem. I paced well on the bike. The run is my weak link and my goal was to have it be the same time as my 1/2 marathon back in April which was 2:55:12 so I was very close :). I think had I not stopped two times to cop a squat on side of road and not stopped to take pictures with my two girlfriends (who were running with me) at the beautiful waterfall I could have made my time. However, I'd take none of it back - it only added to my experience. The temperature was cool, breezy and overcast entire day so it made for great race conditions!

The race has shown me that I can do ANYTHING I set my mind to and further motivated me to continue in my path.

We did it!

Enjoying the scenery

I will be having other posts for each leg of the race for the readers out there who want all the deets.

Keep living your dream kids!

Updates! (stay tuned for more)

It has been way too long my friends I apologize. Many BIG things have occurred since we last spoke, I'll try not to let this post be toooooo long ;).

July 3rd:
I had the honor of being a bridesmaid for one of my closest friends Deanna. Let me tell you being a bridesmaid IS as stressful as everyone says but it wasn't because of the bride :). Being a bridesmaid you want to make sure your friend has everything she dreamed of, hoped for, you want everything to be perfect for them. It's there special day. Deanna's wedding was WONDERFUL, she looked beautiful and the entire day went off flawlessly. It was a fairy tale wedding just like their story. She married a great guy but he, well he married a gem. That's my Dee Dee a gem with the biggest heart and always a great attitude. A true friend. I'm glad I could share that day with them. Cheers to Deanna and Frank, wishing you happiness, good health, success, laughter and above all love and friendship throughout your life together.

July 18th: Nautica NYC Olympic Tri
Short of it:

right after I completed my 1st Oly!

It was freaking HOT! 90 degrees, 60 or 70% humidity. HOT. Pretty unbearable. BUT I'm very happy with my times :). My super secret goals were:
Swim: 30 min based on everyone saying current is so fast and it takes me just under 50min to swim a mile.
Bike: 1:30 or 1:40 I wanted my avg pace to be 16. But I wasn't sure I could pull it off cuz that's what I did last year on a flat sprint course.
Run: goal was to try and run straight and walk the stations. Finish in 1:30
(yes I know that's slow).

My results:
swim:19:46 pace 1:11
T1 15:02 (we had 2run just under 1/2 mile 2 T1...I'm just sayin)
bike:1:35:37 avg 15.6
T2 6:47

wearing my t-shirt & medal next day at work :)

run:1:26:04 avg 13:52.
total time 3:43:13
I finished strong and with a smile despite it being so freaking hot and having high BS (blood sugar) since the bike portion (I need to work on BS mgmt while racing). Thank you so much guys for the support!

Long of it:
I competed in my first Olympic distance triathlon NYC Nautica tri; consists of a .90mile swim down the Hudson, 24mile bike on the Westside Highway into the Bronx and back, and 1 loop around Central Park. I had my concerns about the run because its not really my thing and the temps were VERY high with lots of humidity. I was very concerned prior to the race because I had been having a very difficult time training in the heat especially on the runs; plus I hadn't run 6 miles since my half marathon back in April. BUT I did it! It was a very well run race with lots of support although they could have had more run stations. I loved running through the hose. Heaven in that heat. Everyone should do that race at least once and I'm glad that was my first Olympic distance.

On to the next weekend July 23-26:
I went with three friends to Ironman Lake Placid to volunteer. All but one is diabetic and all but one (not same person) will be competing in our first Ironman distance triathlon on July 24th,2011. We were able to ensure our entry by volunteering for this event. The event of all events. One of the most physically challenging and demanding events in the world. Some of you might not know what an Ironman is, I'll tell you:

Ironman distance is the longest distance in triathlon that consists of swimming 2.4miles, biking 112miles and running a marathon 26.2miles. All within 17hours and the allotted time frames for each leg of the race.

Being at Ironman that weekend was inspiring, motivating, thrilling! A complete rush. I had friends and teammates racing at the Placid course so it was great to be able to help them at the aid stations or just cheering for them whenever I caught a glimpse while out on the course. The placid course is a 2 loop course for each leg so while volunteering on the run station I was able to see fresh faces as they made it through the first loop, when it came to the 2nd loop there were a whole other set of faces. Some were wilted, some displayed fierce determination while others just showed a constant smile, there were even athletes forcing themselves to throw up on the course!

Midnight is the 17hour cut off time. Being able to see the last person who made it as an official ironman was nerve racking and exhilarating all at once. The energy of the crowd is ELECTRIC! Volunteering at an Ironman event is humbling and inspiring.

Me right after I signed up for my 1st Ironman!!!! IMLP 2011

The next morning with less than 5 hours sleep feeling like a zombie I waited in line for 4 hours so I could sign up for 2011. Before I even signed those papers and put a small fortune down for the race fee I was committed. Signing those papers only made it official :).

On the road to our 1st IM :)

we've got our pumps & paid registration!!!

And so my Ironman road has officially begun! Looking forward to embracing every moment this year will bring.

Ragnar Essay

I created an essay for team Glucomotives Great River Ragnar Relay. If it's chosen we could win Suunto watches, get featured on the website, have it submitted to the media or a television interview. I wanted to share the essay with all of you, I hope you enjoy!

“I love running. I feel alive. My muscles ache. My lungs tire. And I feel good. It's as simple as that!”

We’re a 14-member team consisting of 2 drivers and 12 runners from across the country; most have never met each other face to face. We’ve come together to take a 24-hour racing road trip to cover 198 miles across Minnesota to spread the word about our cause and to prove to ourselves more than anything that we CAN. What is our vehicle of choice? The Great River Ragnar Relay. What makes us different from the 200+ other teams racing? Every single member of our team is diabetic. As a team we have lived over 150 years with diabetes. What makes us even cooler than every other team racing is that this is not the first Ragnar Relay Team Glucomotive has raced; last year we had an all diabetic team at the Ragnar Relay Del Sol-one of our runners has raced every Ragnar Del Sol relay. Next year we hope to race another location that Ragnar offers.

"Team Glucomotive is Insulindependence's running and walking club for people with diabetes, promoting successful diabetes management through casual training and serious racing.” Last year when I first heard of running in a relay with an all diabetic team I said "sign me up!”. Despite having never run a relay, not even liking the idea of running, it sounded like a great adventure, full of smiling, sweaty, stinky new friends with a wealth of knowledge about training, racing and managing diabetes. Plus, I had decided that in 2011 I'd be racing in my first Ironman, so really I had to start running since my first marathon would be at Ironman. My teammates have dubbed me "Jen Ironwoman in training", a fitting nickname I think. So with all that, how could I POSSIBLY say no to running this relay? Never a doubt. Being part of Glucomotive and Insulindependence has truly helped to change my life by surrounding me with other diabetics that inspire me by their personal and athletic endeavors.

Though we have yet to meet, my team has already earned a special place in my heart. We have all been getting to know each other via email, phone calls and reading each other’s blogs. Some of the team was able to share with me a few of their accomplishments and what this race means to them:

"I’m a lifelong runner and an official Marathon Maniac; having run 51 marathons and 5 ultra marathons in the past 11 years and 9 months. And I just love running.”–Jerry

“The Ragnar Relay Del Sol ‘08 was the first running event I had done EVER (since high school 16 years before). When I found out there was an all diabetic team, I wanted to be a part of that! Ragnar Relay was one of those events that LITERALLY changed my life, and if I could do that surrounded by people who weren't letting this disease stop them, I wanted in. Thanks, Ragnar!!”-Jenny

“This is my first relay run! I am running the Ragnar race because I want to start my own branch of Insulindependence on the East Coast” –Emily

“Since running the New York marathon I also ran the Barcelona marathon and the Berlin half marathon - I am definitely hooked. Running is such a 'sweet' treat for anyone, but as someone living with type 1 diabetes, I think that running is a much needed escape, a moment during our busy 24 hour days where we can forget about the glucose meter, forget about the number of carbs in our meal, forget about our rotating sites, or forget about grandma's recipe that undoubtedly will have too much sugar in it...and remember that our daily journeys, be it in a "I'm running a 24 hour relay race" format or a "there's no such thing as a normal routine when you have diabetes" 24 hour daily stretch, are just that - journeys.”-Anne

“Running is by far the most simple of the athletic activities to get the "exercise" fix and for sure the best ‘bang for the buck’, meaning it gets the job done to help the mental and physical wellbeing relative to diabetes management.” –Pratt

“When first diagnosed I was told I would never compete never run, cycle or train like I used to. I somewhat lost myself, had no direction, got all sorts of depressed. Until I discovered that I can do this. I can do everything that I enjoy and then some. Diabetes isn't an excuse it’s a way of life. I want to help others realize this and achieve their goals.”-Daniel

“I’ve never run in a relay event, but training for this is making running a little more focused and fun with an improvement in diabetes management a nice side-affect!” –Mike

“This is the first running event I have ever participated in!” –Corinne

“I was diagnosed with Type 1 almost 8 years ago and I starting running in the fall of 2008. Since then I have run 1 marathon, 2 half's, a hand full of 10 milers, 2 Olympic Distance Tri's, and an 8-hour Adventure Race.” –Gary

“This is my first time running in a relay, first time running in Minnesota. I came to running via triathlons and although it was my weakest after cycling and swimming, it's now my second favorite (still love to cycle).”-Carlene

“I have seen running serve two major purposes in my life. One, to help control diabetes and two, to prove to myself that I can physically perform as good and better than any other person without diabetes. I was very successful at both, keeping my A1C near normal and having some great running accomplishments. However, there was one thing that always made me stand out…as everyone else is hanging out at the start of the race and gearing up to go…I am looking for a place to check my blood sugar and see if I can safely compete. As everyone else is trying to figure out their mile pace and estimate their finish time while racing, I do the same but also do different kind of math wondering how high my sugars are and if I will make it to the finish at all. After the race, everyone is basking in their glory, talking about the race, eating snacks and drinking Gatorade. I am busy checking my sugars and trying to find a private place to administer insulin to treat post race highs. What running Ragnar means to me is providing me with the opportunity to take on something physically challenging, but more than that, it enables me to do it with the people just like myself and not feel different for the very first time in life.”-Igor

My team inspires me and makes me smile. I’m sure they will do the same for you. Thank you for reading.

Sincerely,
Jen
“Ironwoman in training”

Coaches

I'm reading The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch. If you get the chance, read the book or watch his video on YouTube, I don't think you'd regret it. As I was reading I came to the end of one chapter titled "I never made it to the NFL". There was one paragraph that stuck with me:

"...Coach Graham keeps showing up in my head, forcing me to work harder whenever I feel like quitting, forcing me to be better. When we send our kids to play organized sports-football, soccer, swimming, whatever-for most of us its not because we're desperate for them to learn the intricacies of the sport. What we really want them to learn is far more important: teamwork, perseverance, sportsmanship, the value of hard work, an ability to deal with adversity".

That paragraph got me thinking about how I have become involved in sports, the teams I'm part of, my teammates and above all my coaches. My coaches who whether they realize it or not, "show up in my head, forcing me to work harder whenever I feel like quitting, forcing me to be better". My coaches have also calmed many of my fears when I get closer to the "big day" my A race/event. And let me tell you I panic. I'll inevitably send the text or email asking my coach if they really think I could it, if I trained enough, if the hills are as hard as I think, questioning everything. That's me in panic mode. Stressing.

You know what they say? They tell me I can, they remind me of what I've already accomplished, they tell me I've trained on harder hills. They reassure me and calm me down. On my 2nd century ride I was stressing about a hill everyone had been talking about, so the day before I texted my coach and asked him if he thought I could do the hill and finish the 100 miles in time. His words: "you've trained on harder hills". That's all I needed to hear cuz when I got to that hill I rode it slow and steady. When I reached the top I said to myself and teammates "come on we can finish this ride, that's the hardest hill, coach said I could do it, and if he said I can than I can!" and I did :).

I've learned a lot from my coaches so far. I respect them tremendously; their ability to see the bigger picture, to be the calm in the storm, for their patience, for their knowledge in the sport, for always pushing me, for being able to draw that fine line of expecting more and being supportive of what I CAN do. Coaches have a hard job. Mine have inspired me.

Next year I plan on applying to be a captain and coach for two of my teams and can hopefully inspire and teach others the way my coaches have and continue to teach me. No matter if you're a kid or adult when you join an organized sport Randy's words hold true and you do learn "teamwork, perseverance, sportsmanship, the value of hard work, an ability to deal with adversity".

THANK YOU Jon R., Delaine, Lewis, Tim, Mike, Danny, John S., Cary & Tom you guys are THE BEST!

Re-learning

Formulas. Addition. Subtraction. Planning. Calculating. Ratios. Have I told you that I don't like math? You'd think I was taking a class with that stuff right? Wrong. It's what I have to think about every day when I'm trying to get my blood sugar management under control.

I've been working with a new CDE (certified diabetes educator), I chose her because she is also a sports nutritionist. Definitely a plus and a necessity these days. I decided to revisit this whole process because I feel like I'm not in the best control. I'm swinging between high and low too often. I'm working with my triathlon coach and my training has increased a lot. I'm learning (or at least trying) how to do everything at once:
•train consistently
•train efficiently
•not neglect my friends, family or other social obligations
•learn how to eat so I can fuel my body for the stress I'm putting it under
•learn how to adjust my insulin for each of the 3 disciplines (swim,bike,run)
•learn how to do it all I guess

I have such huge goals for myself the next two years but I won't be able to it right if I can't get my blood sugar management under better control. It really is so very scientific too. Cause and effect. 9 times out of 10 there was a reason for the high or low. Its UNDERSTANDING the why and how of it that will help me better manage. If not I'll continue this vicious physical and emotional yo-yo effect, which can become quite draining.

Do I find it annoying to have to write everything down? You betcha. Will I continue to write everything down? Yup, BECAUSE this is temporary. I don't have to write everything down all the time. I'm working on correcting these swings just as I am training to be able to swim, bike and run whatever distances I have planned for myself.

Practicing, training, logging info and being consistent. All ingredients for becoming a better athlete and understanding my diabetes management. What keeps me going is seeing that perfect BG (blood sugar) after a training session, seeing that my HR (heart rate) IS starting to come down in a run. Its all hard work but when you get to see those moments...well, it just makes it all worth it.

Monday's Run = A Hot Mess

On Monday I had to run 42min keeping my HR (heart rate) in a certain zone. Legs were feeling a tad tight when I started. It was HOT, 60% humidity heat index of 84. Sweating my ass off lol. I was thankful for a run/walk ratio of 6:1. While I was running I felt a little weird but chalked it off to the heat. Well I was wrong. When I hit the 21min mark it was time to walk so I did but also stretched - my legs felt REALLY tight. I took a 2min stretch break rather than walk break. Resumed. Felt weird again and was gonna wait til my next break but decided against it and just checked my BG (Blood sugar). Well I was 36. I did a double take and checked it again to make sure it was right and it said I was 37! NOT GOOD (normal BG is between 70-120). Then I started feeling real bad real quick. I shut my insulin pump off. Ate a gel. I was hoping I'd feel better very quickly by doing this.

My friends were passing me on their return trip back and one stopped to walk with me. I was grateful to have someone at that moment. She gave me some jelly belly sports beans and we walked together for about 10min after which I told her to just go ahead I'd meet up with them in a few. I did not think I would pass out so I wanted her to go. I felt bad for holding her back. I couldn't stand still and I couldn't run anymore so I just walked. Slowly. After she left I walked maybe 5 more minutes and wanted to try running but yeah that wasn't good. I only took a few steps before I realized I couldn't run.

So I walked the last 20minutes. When I got to our starting point I was feeling much better. Enough that I thought I could run the last 1/4mile out the park. I felt like I wasn't going to let the betes (diabetes) end my run. So I ran a hard 1/4mile. I felt better in the end for doing it because it was kinda like falling off a horse. If you fall you have to get back on. I HAVE literally fallen off a horse and gotten back on. So today I felt like I did the same thing even though I didn't do the workout in it's entirety. I at least did the first half :) and I finished it with a run. When I left the park my BG was 122...perfect!

I learned a lesson though. I didn't listen to my better judgment and keep my temp basal on (as I should have) and I shouldn't have given myself the minuscule blood sugar correction of .25units when my blood sugar before starting the run was only 178 (I was paranoid about going really high since I was rising). huh lesson learned I guess.

PS
For those that don't know, a temp basal is when you reduce or increase the amount of your basal insulin by a certain %. Basal is the base insulin delivered by your insulin pump delivered approximately every 5 minutes to try and regulate your blood sugar. Its trying to be similar to a working pancreas. A bolus is the insulin you give yourself to correct a high blood sugar or its the insulin you give yourself to cover carbohydrates in a meal.